I’ve been thinking about change for a while. It might be something to do with the fact that it is 25 years since I left school. When you start getting Facebook friend requests from people who you haven’t heard from for more than 20 years you know something is in the offing! A reunion is taking place in June and I have mixed feelings about attending. I suspect pretty much anyone who has ever considered attending a reunion has this sort of ‘should I -shouldn’t I’ feeling.
A reunion makes you take stock. What have you done with your life? On paper, I’ve done loads: I’ve written more than 20 books, have three amazing children, and a great house on the sea front. But actually, that’s not the big changes that are important to me. What is important is that I like myself now. I don’t think I liked myself very much when I was a teenager and it took a while – and meeting some good friends – to work out that I’m OK. And that’s nothing to do with what I’ve achieved, either.
I know that while I might not always like change or find it easy at the time, I can change and adapt. I’m good at making the best of things and seeing opportunities. I was bored stiff on my first maternity leave, so during the second one I wrote the first draft of my first book. I couldn’t walk for 6 months while pregnant with K, and it limited what I could do for some time afterwards as well, so I got into blogging, and brought in some help to launch a new book. I’ve learned that I can do more with help than without, too, and have built some great alliances.
I know that I’ve changed enormously. Some of the changes have been unexpected, some due to situations that I have been thrust int and forced to adapt. Other changes have been planned, but that didn’t always make them easier to handle. But now, as the children get older, and I know more changes are on their way, I’m confident that I can face them, learn from them, and make the most out of life.
I’m not going to go to the reunion. I don’t need to see what everyone else is doing to know that I’m doing OK.